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写于2008年11月5日
缘起：近日与人闲聊，有感而发。遂于忙碌之中匆匆写下。
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一个山区小伙，担任着邮差的工作，早出晚归，风雨无阻。他的口碑在同行里最好，只要接下任务，不论路程何等艰难，他必能在规定时间送到。他常背一面“使命必达”的旗帜，别人见了，就知道是他来了，都翘起姆指交相称赞；更有些长辈会将孩子从屋里拉出来，看着他的背影，板起脸，说些让人听不懂的话，孩子们唯唯诺诺，也不知听进了多少，又溜进屋里去了。
很多年过去，某天冒着暴风雪清早出门的小伙子，过了四五天都不见回来。人们议论纷纷，谣言流传，说是他天天起早贪黑翻山越岭，难免遭遇不测，摔下山谷去了。众人大感惋惜，更有人骂天道不公，好人短命，却没有人肯去将他的尸身寻回来安葬。那个托他送信的人家，也不过暗骂自己晦气丢了几件衣物，心里难受了几天便已忘记。时光荏苒，日月如梭，人们的注意力渐渐转移，山村又恢复了平静，偶尔遇到糟糕天气，与外界音讯断绝，人们方才会想起有过这么一个人，有过这么一面旗。
直到有一天，小伙重又回到山村，不过他没带旗帜，更拿油彩涂花了脸，教人看不出自己的容貌。他瘸着腿行走在人群之间，用嘶哑难听的话询问曾经的自己。诸人回答各不相同，有人如实说他某日跌下山崖，从此再无音讯；有人讥笑他做事过于认真，那种天气出门无异自寻死路；有人更是说物竞天择适者生存，死脑筋的家伙活该摔死。小伙找到最后托他送信的人家，那人满口惋惜，却只是说邮差工作危险有加，如此意外，殊难预料，自己只能表示遗憾云云。
小伙心如刀绞。那一天他因送信人的一句恳求，顶风冒雪去走极危险的近路，为的是在中午之前能把托付的东西送到。暴风雪中，他果然遭遇不测，失足摔下，断了几根肋骨，在雪地里昏迷不醒。幸而傍晚有一个姑娘路过将他救起，送至最近的旅店休息。性命虽然捡回，但右腿严重冻伤残废，要说使命必达，已经毫无可能。
小伙静养几月，意气消沉，长吁短叹，思忖自己既已成废人，后半生该如何度过。待得伤好大半，他不顾姑娘劝说，执意要赶回山村，想要看看自己莫大的牺牲，能换得什么样的结果。他想起平日行走阡陌，所闻赞叹之声甚多，诸位长辈赞赏有加，后生小辈皆以之为榜样。平日听得惯了，他仿佛便认为自己身份重要，地位不凡，于是早起晚归不辞辛劳，收件送信愈发勤快，为的是又一句赞扬，又一番欣赏。现下自己遭遇变故，总该好言宽慰，嘘寒问暖罢。
姑娘笑他天真幼稚，劝他先回村乔装打听，尔后待机而动。小伙子依言而行，视众人行为举止，昔日称颂早已不见，轻狂少年施以嘲笑，巍巍老者闭口不言，当事者推卸责任，旁观者早已忘却。他心寒万分，只得拖着瘸腿，失意而去。一连几天，小伙辗转反侧，难以入眠，自己所作所为虽不惊天动地，但无愧于心；旁人举止虽猥琐世俗，但细细想来，却也无可厚非。世事如此，即便是以他二十多年粗浅阅历，本该看得透彻通明，淡然处之；可现下哀痛盈胸，愤闷满怀，窒得几欲晕去，试问悲从何来？
小伙难以作答，姑娘说那是人心。腾达时惹人羡慕，落魄时遭人白眼，身死时无人问津，本是常情；只是小伙爱听赞扬，心怀虚荣，时日长久，默化潜移，为外物所驱而不自知，为人言所诱而不自持，飘飘然浑不知所以，懵懵然竟不知何者为重，将十年辛苦，都投进人心的大池里去，池里只映得众人刹那笑颜，却唯独见不到自己。
小伙听罢，如醍醐灌顶，喟然长叹，不尽凄苦，然自思后悔无益，唯有顿足而已。思前想后，翻来覆去脑中只是起早摸黑，取件送信，连日奔劳，风雨夜归，如此十年如一，竟无它种景象。他生性粗疏，计费不尽精确，房屋破败，屡次遭人盗窃，因此十年积蓄不过无几。要付姑娘这几月房租杂费，已是十去其一。
姑娘知他囊中羞涩，不再执意讨要；然而小伙子心知继续居住也是万万不能，于是择一个阳光灿烂的早晨，向她郑重道别。姑娘问及此去何往，他对天苦笑，天地之大，自己又有何处可去？唯有回家一途，向熟人借些劣地耕作，糊口维生而已；昔日些微荣耀，不过如过眼烟云，转瞬散尽。
临别，姑娘拿出旗帜包裹，言之是当日掉落在他身边，一起拣回。小伙闻言，猛然大呼，一把抢过，背上旗帜，扫过包上地址，便草草拜别。姑娘满眼含泪，后悔莫及，知此一别小伙必定凶多吉少。可他执念如此深重，心思如此单纯，世间碌碌，有几人能够做到？罢了，罢了，不如了其心愿罢。
两个月后，姑娘寻到山村，破屋仍在，然人已不知去了何处。姑娘找到最后托他送信的人家，追问情由，果然在某天傍晚，包裹已经送到，但邮差浑身伤痕，惨不忍睹，三分像人，倒有七分像鬼，家人骇然之际，将他推出屋外。比及天黑开门再去看时，已不知所踪。
姑娘见其陈述吞吞吐吐，显是那日受惊不小，不意再度惊扰，就此拜别。行至一处，竟看见小伙泥塑立于祠堂，诸般冥器皆已置办完备，香火缭绕青烟袅袅。原来邮差作鬼，履约送信，此事早已传遍村里，众人个个悚然，慌忙出钱出工，塑像建祠，求个心安。如此齐心协力，不过一月有余，已然有模有样。祠堂门口有碑石，记叙其人一生功绩。姑娘细细品读，笔迹娟秀，文辞华丽，正要颔首叫好，然虑及此情此境，顿觉句句虚饰，字字可憎，不免悲从心来。
人已逝，尸骨无存，这些又有何用？
此时正是夕阳西下，收工时光。姑娘见不远处人群聚集，男孩掷石为戏，女孩翩跹起舞，少年呼朋唤友，老者谈古论今，皆无忧无虑，怡然自得。回望小伙泥塑，大旗扛肩，包裹夹腋，一双明眸眺视远方，略显凝重。使命加于身则身不得轻，责任系于心则心不得闲，日日夜夜步履匆匆，悠然恬淡与己无缘，末了如风离去，一世记忆散入陈年书简，不复为人提及。
此一生是耶？非耶？
姑娘摇头，也不知答案，然而却在悲伤之余，略感欣慰。终于，他这一回历尽艰辛不辱使命，非因外物而起，非因他言而动，只为从一而终之夙愿，是为己而非为人。
In a distant, mountainous village, there was a young postman who works diligently, day and night. To fulfill his duty, he leaves home early and stays up late, regardless of blowing wind and pouring rains. As a result, his reputation stands out among his colleagues.
“All mails and packages shall be delivered on time”, the postman promised, “regardless of weather and terrains.”.
The promise was printed on a flag, carried by him, and seen by others. Villagers praise him advertently. Parents reference him as a model who carry honor and glory, for their children to follow.
Many years passed until one day came.
On that day, the postman left the village early morning, in a blowing blizzard, with a package, and did not come back. It had been five days and rumors started to spread.
“He must have fallen to the valley when walking into a dangerous pathway towards his destination!”
People feel sorry about him. “A misfortune to a good man!”, someone cried. However, no one has the courage to carry back his body from that dangerous pathway, to rest him in peace.
The client who asked him to send the package to a relative, regret losing the package unluckily, and forgot the incident.
Time flies and the common memory started to fade away. When bad weather comes and families stay in cozy homes, someone may occasionally mention that particular postman with a flag, the silhouette they once were familiar with.
A few months later, the postman came back to the village.
He did not carry the flag, walking lame and deliberately disguise himself as a complete stranger. With a hoarse voice, he asked people about the postman who tried to fulfill his last duty.
He found different answers. Someone told what they heard, others criticized that he takes too much risk and ruins his own life, or even laughed at his stubbornness trying to achieve an impossible mission.
The postman finally asked the client. The client replies with a voice in sorrow: “oh, I am really sorry for him. Such an accident is unexpected. Uhm, unexpected and this is his duty. I can do nothing but to show … to show empathy.”
The postman was heartbroken.
On that day, he took a dangerous shortcut in the presence of blizzard, in order to get to the destination faster. In the blizzard, he slipped into a valley and fell into coma, breaking ribs. Fortunately, a girl walked by in that evening and rescue him to the nearby accommodation.
While he survived, he became lame permanently with the right leg severely frost-bitten. Now “deliver on time” becomes an impossible mission for him.
The postman stayed in bed for a few months. He was depressed by the irrecoverable disability and started to think about the rest of his life. When he recovered, he insisted to visit the village again, eager to check the outcome of his utmost sacrifice, from the villagers.
He still remembered that, he had been praised by the old, admired by the young, regarded as important and respected as the best. He was motivated to work hard and to take the risk, because of the compliment of the others.
“If I come back, maybe they will welcome me as a hero and help me wholly-hearted.”
The girl who takes care of him, made fun of his comments.
“Maybe you can go back in disguise and read what they think first,” she suggested, “and decide your next move”.
He took her advice, went back to the village, only to see the villagers already forgot his deeds. He was deeply disappointed.
For a few days, the young man couldn’t sleep well. What he did was not earth-shattering, but at least worthy of heart; what others say was from their self-interest but still reasonable. Everything seems fine, but why he feels so heartbroken and depressed?
The young man couldn’t find an answer. The girl smiled and said:
“That is the nature of humans. They admire the elite, despise the despicable and forget the dead. You feel disappointed just because you build yourself on the honor given to you. Driven by the external compliments, you never know what is the most important to you. Ten years have passed, and you serve their desire and need. They give you complements, and you lose yourself.”
“Thank you. You enlightened me.” The young man sighed, deeply.
He recalled his old days. He has devoted himself to his work: he got up early, delivered and came back late at night. Over the ten years, he lived in a plain apartment, and saved little money for himself.
Knowing his situation, the girl did not charge his stay. However, the young man is determined to leave. On one sunny day, he thanked the girl and chose to say farewell.
The girl asked: “Well … what is your destination?”
“I have no choice.” he replied with a bitter smile, “I will come back to the village. Hopefully I could get some lands from relatives to survive the rest of my life. My honor has gone and never come back again.”
When he was about to leave, the girl showed him the flag, and the package he dropped in the valley on that unfortunate day of blizzard. The postman stared at the package, checked its address, grabbed it with a long sigh, and disappeared at the end of the road.
The girl regretted. She wept.
She knew him so well.
“He has the determination that few of us have. Let him go.”
Two months later, the girl visited the village and found his apartment. The young man was not there. She then found the client who asked the postman to send the final package to the relatives, and the client told her a horror story, with a pale face and an upset voice:
“The other day a shadow came to the house of my relative, and knocked the door. It was twilight with dark, cloudy sky and cold blowing wind. My relative opened the door and saw a human-shaped figure. The figure held the package and was covered with dust and blood, too terrifying to stare at. My relative was super scared and thought she met with a ghost.”
“So … she pushed the ghost away into the chilling wind, and slammed the door in horror. When the night came, she dared to open the door again, and no one was there anymore.”
The girl nodded and left, without asking more details.
She wandered around in the village, and was surprised to see a monument of the postman. In front of the monument, there were flowers, candles and objects that are believed to have the mythical power to rest the dead in peace.
She asked the people nearby. They told her the ghost story again, concluded that he died in pain and sorrow, and his soul was not settled at rest. The villagers then rushed to fund-raise and build the monument, all in one month.
She read the epitaph that recorded the achievement of the dead. She saw beautiful handwriting, elaborated sentences and well-designed decorations.
Thinking of his destiny, sadness came from her heart.
“He passed away. Nothing left behind. This monument is just a useless junk.”
She murmured. The twilight came. The sun was about to set. People come back from their daily work and started to enjoy life. Boys playing, girls dancing, youngsters flirting with friends and elders sitting calmly and smiling.
Everyone enjoys their lives.
She turned back, paying attention gently to the sculpture of the young man. With the flag on the shoulder and the package below the armpit, his eye gazed afar, and his face appeared solemn.
“Once you are on duty, you are not free. Day and night, your step is hasty; spring and fall, you enjoy no leisure. Finally, you leave us with your deeds hidden in the history, and never be mentioned again.”
“Is your entire life worth it?”
The girl did not know the answer.
All of a sudden, her mind was enlightened by a spark, and her sadness is relieved:
“At least, in this final part of your journey, you fulfilled the mission not because of the external compliments, but just because of yourself, because of your determination.”
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